Monday, January 31, 2011

Pooping Stars

One of my grandsons told me recently that he could poop stars.

Really. I'm not making his up. If you've read any of my previous blogs about my children and grandchildren, you will know I'm telling the truth. We are a creatively weird bunch of people.

But Kaden's comment got me thinking about the absurdity of the many ways people can alter their bodies. Multiple piercings, metal objects surgically implanted under the skin, various out-of-control hair styles and colors, pornographic body landscapes – the list goes on.

Don't get me wrong – I think some body art is OK. Creative expression can be beautiful. I happen to like some tattoos and piercings. My ears are pierced – three times in each ear. Some piercings, however, hurt just to look at them.

What bothers me the most, though, is unnecessary "cosmetic" surgery. I can see getting breast implants if your butt is so large, you look lopsided. I can see bald men getting hair implants if they think hair is necessary to feel better about themselves, but I cannot understand why surgeons feel it is ethically acceptable to defile a human body by placing metal protrusions all over it. Why not place metal cones in your buttocks if you want to look ridiculous?

Let's say I wanted to gold-plate pigeon droppings and then have them permanently implanted on the top of my nose. The way surgeries are today, I'm sure I could find some surgeon willing to perform any kind of ridiculous surgery I wanted.

Surgeries are getting so bizarre, in fact, I half expect the next new craze to be getting rectums cut into various shapes so people can poop out stars.

(Videos above are of my grandson, Kaden, singing a song he made up. And, since I'm showcasing one singing grandchild, I would also like to include my granddaughter, Audrey, singing her made-up "short" song.)

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